Dating another girl she met
I want to support her to start thinking through some of this for herself, but whereas she used to have very good judgment, these days she's running on low self esteem and hormones and I believe would follow anybody home who told her she had beautiful eyes. I talked to her about birth control and safe sex and she clearly was not ready. She went to his house once or twice, all when parents were home. When she has been out later with others I often pick her up (the joys of cell phones! I guess when there is another boyfriend I will want to meet him also.( And yes, we've been addressing the low esteem for years.)She has no experience with dating. I say I could get behind that better if he would stop commenting on her physical beauty and if she would stop gushing. When she saw him I kept my cell phone on and when they were alone for the first time and he was pressuring her for sex, she called me and I picked her up immediately. I think it's a matter of what you are comfortable with and what she wants too.Make sure she has condoms if she will be alone with him. Single mom of teenager Well, I don't have that much experience with this as my daughter is 15 also. This totally embarasses her and she doesn't want to talk about it, but I think she's listening.The new shot that prevents cervical cancer would be a good idea too. She's in a kinda bookish group at school, and few of her friends have ''gone out'' with guys yet. Did you or another adult chauffeur, or was it at one of the kids' homes? I give my daughter possible things to say to boys in different situations because sometimes we just can't think of the right words at the right time! anon Group dating seems to be the best idea I heard until ...maybe 18?You are obviously aware that a teen who is acting out like this will rebel against very restrictive rules, but that still leaves you room to maneuver.
They have to be based on something else, giving her reasonable guidelines within which to learn to take responsibility for herself.
I am only speaking from experience my daughter, found herself pregnant at 14 and although it brought us closer together emotionally, it was not a pleasant experience.
She is now 18, more mature and a fabulous person, looking back she says I was just a kid - what did I know that something like that would happen to me. I have a 16 year old daughter, though she is pretty easy, but I was a troubled 16 year old once (and I have also transracially adopted a child with challenges).
I will speak from my experience as a troubled teen.
The most important thing you can do (and obviously already are) is to be involved, and concerned.I find myself in the unsettling position of wanting to say very conventional things like ''An 18 year old boy only has one thing in mind.'' And then I feel bad. Older guys pick on younger, more vulnerable girls because it's harder for them to say no. They mostly spent time together at school, at lunch, or met before school for coffee. I told her that I wanted to meet him before they went ''out'' anywhere. Just make sure she knows that she can call you anytime and you will pick her up. That way she might talk to you about any things she doesn't know how to handle.Talk to your daughter about different things that can happen when she is with him and let her know she can make a choice about what she wants to do. I also tell her if he wants to ''go farther'' than she does, she absolutely has the right to say ''no''.That does not mean, that if you think she is too young that you need to hide that opinion, but present it in a way that acknowledges her ability to make different decisions, and make sure it conveys your concerns about the effects her choices may have on her rather than an issue of right or wrong.